Stacey Loscalzo

Jul 08

Turning 12

by Stacey


carolineDear Caroline,

Twelve years ago today, you were born and I became a mother.

babyWhen you looked like this, I believed that the whole parenting thing would be a piece of cake once I was getting enough sleep. It turned out that while sleep is helpful, it does not give you all the wisdom you need to parent.

Watching you navigate the new world of middle school this year showed me what it really means to be a mom. I need to be there to listen and guide but also to let go. I’ve always loved you but this year, I really came to understand just how much I admire the person you are growing to become.

This year, you were the pure embodiment of a tween. You loved and hated. You were brave and fearful. You were creative and stuck. You took risks and hid. You tried so, so hard and wanted to quit. You experienced all of this with us and on your own. I feel like I watched you grow up right in front of me. You are a different girl than the one I knew at this same time last year.

I find it harder and harder to write these letters each year as you become more and more private. There were times when  you didn’t even know I was writing to you in this space. And then there were times when you knew but were happy with anything I said. Now you have become more private as you take just another step to being the amazing grown up I know you will be. So for this space, this is all for now.

Just know how much I love you and how proud I am of the year you just had. Happy Birthday baby girl and here’s to an amazing year to come.

Love you,




  1. Aunt Connie says:

    Happy Birthday, Caroline…..your Mom is giving you a perfectly beautiful gift every year for your special day.

  2. Lindsey says:

    Oh, yes. This makes me cry. They’re changing before our eyes and I love what you say about admiring who she’s becoming. I can relate entirely. xox

    • Stacey says:

      It’s crazy isn’t it? She had the nerve to say today, “I’ll be a grown up in 6 years.”

  3. Melinda Sohval says:

    Stacey, this loving tribute to your 12 year old daughter is an eloquent keepsake and snapshot in time. Mostly though, it is an elegant tribute to your enduring love from a very special mother to her very blessed daughter. 

  4. Kristen says:

    Twelve–whoa. Happy Birthday, C! What a lovely letter, Stacey.

  5. Pamela says:

    Happy Birthday!! You must be so awed and proud!

  6. Abby says:

    So sweet, Stacey! My son just turned 9 but already I’m experiencing some of this. And I also struggle with how much to share as he gets older. But what a blessing for your daughter to have her mother share these beautiful words.

    • Stacey says:

      It really is getting tricky Abby. I can’t figure out what to write anymore. She both wants and doesn’t want her story shared publicly.

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